Lockdown Blues - Part 4

I’m beginning to understand that acceptance is the key to my existence. For the first 14 days of the lockdown, I was really on edge because I really felt my freedom being curtailed, my wings being clipped. The one thing that has always enchanted my free spirit, my joy, my zeal, my soul is the great outdoors, and now it is taken away from me. And this denial of reality, this rage that was building up inside of me didn’t allow me to do the other things that I loved to do - watch some nice series or read a good book. 

And then I gave up in utter despair. Whether I liked it or not, I am trapped where I am with myself and my dog. After 3 days of inactivity, I learned to accept this entire situation, as difficult and as appalling as it is. 

With acceptance came the calmness that I had before the lockdown. I can now once again do the things that I enjoy. My mind is not as restless as it used to be. But I think I have accepted not only this phase in my life but everything that will ever happen in the future. Good or bad, I will accept.

I like to think that I am the hero in my own story. I now accept that my story is a really boring one. All adventure scenes are created and paid for by myself. The majority of my story is made up of mundane trivialities that make no sense most of the time. But so be it. 

I accept that my story will mean nothing in the end. But it’s still my story and it means everything to me. At least, it should 😅.