Nothing at all

I have no idea what the hell has happened to me ever since I came home from my travels. I have always been an introvert, but now more than ever I enjoy being alone, all the time. Since I came back I have met up with some of my friends; some I still liked, some I don't like that much anymore. I guess I will be downsizing my already small group of friends soon. 

I like doing absolutely nothing. I go out of my house out of necessity, to buy food and groceries, to run errands, to jog (since I have had sleeping problems, I was able to jog in the wee hours of the morning, something that I would never have done just over 4 months ago), oh and I had to go see some people about a job. Apart from that, I am happy to stay alone at home. 

I have a friend who is currently out of a job, and within a week was already feeling restless and panicky. By contrast, I have been out of a job for 5 months now and if it were up to me, it would stay that way for a long time to come. She asked me what I did all day and whether I felt bored? And I told her most of the time I do nothing, and I don't feel bored. I don't feel restless. I don't feel the need to socialize. I am happy being left alone. I am happy being in my own world that consists of only me. I like the silence. I like the calm. I like not having to rush anywhere. I like the fantasy world that I have created for myself, far far away from reality. 

I have not read the newspapers for 4 months now. My mother has kept all the Time magazines printed during the time I was away. It is still lying where she left them. It's like I don't want to face reality. Sure, I know sooner or later I would have to. But later rather than sooner. I'd like to continue being in my fantasy world for as long as I possibly can before I face reality again with all its venom, spite, ugliness and darkness.