"Every time you go away"

Every time he leaves I feel wasted. Discarded. Unwanted. Unloved.

I want to walk away but I can't. I guess I'm not as strong as I think I am. 

I hate being weak. I am better than this. I deserve better. 

But I can't say no. It breaks my own heart, as well as his, when I say no.

So I say yes. And he comes. And he leaves. Again.

This has to end. It will end.

I just don't know how. Yet.