Many people, including my own family, think that I am an exceptionally strong and independent woman who will go far in life. I am sure there is a compliment in there somewhere. Unfortunately I don’t quite see it like that.
Underneath the tough appearance that people seem to think I have, I am just a girl. I doubt myself. I am fragile. I would like someone to take care of me. I believe that is what every girl is looking for. Someone to take care of them.
I am a hopeless romantic although I don’t show it. Most of my adult life I spent waiting for my prince charming to come rescue me. To sweep me off my feet, to take care of me, to live happily ever after.
What I didn’t realize was that all these years, I have actually been rescuing myself. Imagine that. I am my own damsel in distress and prince charming all rolled into one. I guess they were right. I am strong and independent.
You would think I would appreciate myself more realizing that. But I don’t. In my own eyes I have failed. I just turned 33. Some people may say I have my whole life ahead of me. But in my mind, I have absolutely nothing to look forward to in life anymore. I am just waiting for my turn to die.
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