I don’t know how I can be happy one minute and sad the next. Maybe they were right. Maybe it’s more than just a phase. Maybe it’s a chemical imbalance in my brain and I really do need help.
The problem with that is, nobody can help me if I don’t help myself. But I don’t know how to help myself. Because I don’t even know what is wrong. Why I feel this way. What is going through my mind right now is, if I had the chance to go back in time and make one change in my life, I would change the fact that I was ever born. Nothing good came out of me being born.
Maybe I should stop trying to make sense of life and just live it. The problem with that is, I am living life but I am not happy. Nothing makes me happy anymore. People can tell me that that is a shame, the world is your oyster etc but this is how I feel right now. Nothing makes me happy anymore. I am here, I am alive, I am doing the bare minimum to stay that way. What kind of a life is that?
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